Amazing Day!

I had a wonderful day today. We got up and went to grocery store for a few things and Jeff picked up some wine .I went to the bank to deposit my Avon money to the library and to take down some bottle for the Vineyard for there Rwanda mission to Adopted a child. I felt great on doing this great deed for someone who really wants to adopt a baby from Rwanda.I felt I was doing this for Robbie in Memory of him in a little way. He brought so much goodness out of me lately. Giving and being Pro Active etc. He has brought me closer to God as well. In that, I’m finally ready to be baptised this August 26Th. Passed four years I wouldn’t even thought or even do that but now , I feel that I ready for God in my life . Robbie has been an instrumental part in my faith and want to become closer to him everyday.

This passed couple of days seemed to be good. I thought of him Lot’s but not to the point I was crying heavily. I vision his face and want so bad to have him in my life but I know that he is not here but in another place and in another form watching me and his family. I truly feel his presence at times of happiness and sadness. I smile and embrace it. I see pretty much everyday a bird, Robin Red Breast around a lot and a beautiful butterfly.I know it’s a sign from Robbie reincarnated into another form telling me he is here watching me. I feel so loved!

Wednesday night July 2 nd, was are last bereavement group. I feel very sad that it was over but I knew that I have made wonderful Friends for life out of this.We shared are items of are little ones and lite a candle in remembrance of them. We had one couple sing a song for there wedding, I sobbed. It felt so good to get it out of my system though. Jeff also wrote a song, that I never heard of .He shocked me. I guess it was the song a couple months back ,when I didn’t want to hear any sad or happy songs and burry myself  in my room. He would say listen to this and I would would say , I can’t and I would go to bed. I felt bad, but I couldn’t be around that right now.The candle ceremony was nice and I felt so happy to share my little shirt me and Elaina made for her when she would see her baby brother.It said on the shirt,”I’m a big sister”. It had a hand print on the back. That was the day ,when I was going in for a routine check up, and swiping of my membranes. That day, I lost my Robbie.

Canada was eventful and so was Tamara’s 18th birthday party.It kept me busy .